I planned my own wedding in less than a year in 2023. There were a lot of bumps during the journey so I wanted to share a few of the lessons I learned (the hard way of course) to help anyone out there planning their own wedding.

Minimize the Number of Vendors

To save costs, I initially used multiple vendors for flowers, decorations, and linens. Without a coordinator to manage everything, though, it became incredibly challenging to keep everyone on the same page. On top of that, I DIY’d several elements like the centerpieces and name cards, which only added to the confusion.

If you can find a single vendor who handles multiple aspects—such as flowers, decorations, and linens—go for it. While it might cost a bit more upfront, it’s worth the peace of mind.

I worked with a vendor called Stacy’s Mom Hawaii Events, who offers services ranging from Filipino catering to décor, centerpieces, flowers, linens, signage, and even photo booths. They were responsive, reasonably priced, and a lifesaver. Check them out on Instagram.

Plan for Last-Minute Surprises

I planned to DIY succulent centerpieces, but as my to-do list grew, I realized I needed help. I found a vendor on Facebook Marketplace who fit my budget, paid the deposit, and thought I was set.

Unfortunately, three months before the wedding, the vendor informed me she’d be unavailable for delivery. Confident I could manage 20 succulent centerpieces for two months, I took on the task myself—big mistake.

Many succulents died due to my packed schedule, leaving me scrambling to replace and repot nearly half of them. This unexpected expense and stress were lessons in planning ahead.

Ask for Help

If you’re planning your own wedding, ask for help—it’s essential. I tend to be hyper-independent, but in hindsight, I wish I’d involved family and friends sooner. For instance, when my succulents started dying, asking for help repotting them would have saved me hours of work and a lot of stress.

There’s no shame in reaching out. Most people are happy to help if you just ask.

Schedule Time with Your Partner

Remember, this wedding is as much your partner’s as it is yours. Make time to connect and discuss wedding details so you don’t feel like you’re planning alone.

My partner and I scheduled monthly check-ins to review our guest list, budget, and invitations. We also did a three-month countdown with monthly date nights where we focused on relaxing and enjoying each other’s company, avoiding wedding talk.

Preserve Your Bouquet Early

If you’re thinking of preserving your bouquet, plan ahead and hire a professional. I assumed a month was enough time to find someone locally—it wasn’t.

These vendors often book up six months in advance. I attempted a DIY preservation and failed miserably. Save yourself the stress and book early.